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Three reasons children won’t eat, and what to do about it
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Nov 06, 2024
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Registered Nutritionist Fern Rodrigues is very familiar with childhood avoidant eating (more commonly known as ‘fussy eating’), and helps families and early learning professionals to avoid and manage food refusal for challenge-free mealtimes.
In the piece below, she explores three common reasons why children in early childhood education and care (ECEC) settings may experience food refusal.When it comes to feeding, she says, there’s no such thing as “one size fits all.” Although children can experience avoidant eating for a variety of reasons, the three most common reasons are:
- Not hungry
- Assurance of having something else that is more appealing
- Neophobia
“One of the first things to amaze me when I started working as an early childhood educator almost eleven years ago was the meals timetable,” Ms Rodrigues began.
“I was surprised with the fact that we were feeding the children every hour-and-a-half or so and, at times, used to think to myself “I’m not hungry yet myself. Are the children going to be?”
“It was something I was really interested in observing because I was already researching and studying children’s avoidant eating (aka fussy eating) behaviours, so I started asking myself if the short interval between meals could be a reason some children would fuss and reject foods which was a frequent occurrence.”
As Ms Rodrigues continued her explorations of avoidant eating, it became apparent that the timing, and children’s lack of hunger signals, may be part of the issue at hand.
“The human body is wired to signal hunger to the brain two to three hours after the last meal,” she continued, “which is the time the body takes to digest what we eat and absorb the nutrients into our bloodstream to then re-start the process.”
“If we offer meals to children with less than two hours in between, some children may not have had the time to feel hungry again and refuse to stop playing to sit down and eat a meal. And if that happens every-now-and-then, we shouldn’t worry and simply accept their “no thanks”, without fuss. It could be that they are genuinely not hungry.”
The importance of taking a division of responsibility approach
Ellyn Satter is an American feeding specialist with more than forty years of experience who conceptualised an effective way of feeding children which is now used around the world by professionals and families.
The concept, Ms Rodrigues said, is quite simple. It puts the adult in charge of WHAT, WHERE and WHEN food will be available for the child, and leaves the child in charge of HOW MUCH and WHETHER to eat it.
“In the context of an early childhood education setting,” she continued, “if food is provided by the service, the adults in charge of creating menus and preparing them are responsible for WHAT is going to be on offer at every meal. They also must be responsible for WHEN the meals will be offered during the day, and responsible for WHERE the meals are going to be served and eaten at.”“In the case of food being brought from home, like in lunchboxes, the adult in charge of deciding WHAT foods are on offer is the parent/caregiver who prepared it. Educators and teachers are then responsible for the other two adults’ jobs: WHERE and WHEN. The other jobs in a meal must be left to the child.”
“WHETHER to eat and HOW MUCH to eat from what is on offer are responsibilities of the eater, the child, as they will know better than anyone else how hungry they are. For almost a century, we have known that children are totally capable of eating an adequate diet without adults’ encouragement nor control. Also, the more we take the child’s responsibilities over as ours, the worse their eating habits can get and avoidant eating develop.”
Remove the fear
While many educators and food professionals in ECEC contexts fear repeated requests for alternate meals, most will ultimately give in and offer one or more alternatives.
“That’s another opportunity that some children take to refuse a meal, usually lunch. They refuse lunch because they are used to the fear adults have of them ‘going hungry’ and know they will be given “something else” which is usually something familiar and liked such as a sandwich or yoghurt,” Ms Rodrigues said.
“Remember that it is the adult’s responsibility to decide WHAT is on the menu? When a child refuses to eat what’s on offer and we allow them to have something else, from the pantry, we are handing over to them that responsibility. Then, many other things start to go off the rails…
- other children will start playing that game and demand a meal replacement (ring any bells?);
- children will be further away from trying the foods we want them to eat;
- more food will be wasted;
- the cook will get more and more confused about quantities to cook, about what dishes to keep on the menu; and so on…
So, one thing I encourage educators to do when presented with this situation is to remind the child that they are free to choose anything from what’s on offer and then divert their attention to choosing about something that they are able to make a good choice, perhaps the colour of their plate or cup or their spot at the table.”
Neophobia
“This word literally means “fear of new things” (neo = new / phobia = fear),” Ms Rodrigues said.
“There is some evidence that humans have developed this protective mechanism to avoid consuming something unknowingly toxic or poisonous. And the way to rid a child of this evolutionary bondage is exposing them to a new food as many times as needed until the child feels ready to try it.”
“I see many cooks disheartened by children’s disregard with their dishes and are constantly looking into modifying their menus and recipes. I try all I can to convince them that they actually need to do exactly the opposite and persist in presenting those, today unliked, foods to give the children a chance to learn to like them. Give them time. That’s how you turn new foods into familiar foods, which children are much more likely to accept.”
Further advice and support
It is important to note that the advice above is targeted at neurotypical children, and that children with additional needs may need additional support and adjusted strategies to overcome their eating difficulties.
To learn more about managing avoidant eating in ECEC settings please see here for a free e-book with suggested strategies.
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