Supporting children’s agency through respectful care: What the Pikler approach offers ECEC settings

Recent media coverage has reignited public discussion about seeking consent from babies and preschoolers during routine care moments. While this may seem new to some, for many early childhood educators, the idea is deeply rooted in pedagogical approaches like the Emmi Pikler philosophy, an approach that centres on trust, connection and children’s right to agency.

Understanding the Pikler approach

Developed by Hungarian paediatrician Dr Emmi Pikler in the mid-20th century, the Pikler approach continues to influence early childhood education and care (ECEC) practice globally. At its core is a deep respect for children as capable, autonomous human beings.

In ECEC settings, Pikler-inspired practice involves slowing down, observing, and engaging children in their own care. Educators speak with children about what is happening, read their cues, and wait for a response whether verbal or non-verbal. Even during moments like nappy changes or nose wiping, the child is treated as an active participant, not a passive recipient of care.

Why consent and connection matter

While very young children may not speak, they express themselves through body language including eye contact, gestures, facial expressions and physical responses. Waiting for a nod, smile or relaxed posture before beginning a care routine helps build predictability and emotional safety.

These practices are not about literal permission, but about relational attunement. They promote consistency, trust and mutual respect, fostering a sense of agency in even the youngest children.

Alignment with quality and regulatory frameworks

Respectful, responsive caregiving directly aligns with key national frameworks:

• The Early Years Learning Framework (EYLF) Version 2.0 highlights “secure, respectful and reciprocal relationships” as a guiding principle.
• The National Quality Standard (NQS), particularly Quality Area 5, centres on positive relationships as the foundation of learning and development.
• The National Quality Framework (NQF) encourages approaches that embed respectful practices in service culture and operations.

For services aiming to exceed the NQS, the Pikler approach reflects all three Exceeding themes:

• Embedded in service operations: Respectful caregiving is not a one-off action it’s consistently woven into daily practice.
• Informed by critical reflection: Educators consider how routines affect children’s agency and emotional wellbeing.
• Shaped by meaningful engagement with families: Families are invited to understand and support these respectful approaches, strengthening the home-service partnership.

Putting respectful care into practice

Transitioning to a Pikler-informed approach often involves shifting from task-oriented routines to relationship-focused interactions. Some practical strategies include:

• Slowing routines to prioritise connection over task completion
• Narrating each step of a care task
• Waiting for cues of comfort or readiness before continuing
• Responding to verbal and non-verbal communication
• Fostering predictability through key educator relationships

These strategies build children’s confidence and sense of autonomy, while reinforcing a culture of safety and trust within the learning environment.

Consent as a relational practice, not a checklist

Framing consent in ECEC is less about binary yes-or-no questions and more about creating a rhythm of respect. It means involving children in routines, responding to their signals, and treating their bodies and preferences with care.

By modelling consent and responsive caregiving, educators demonstrate to children that their voice and experience matter, laying important groundwork for future self-awareness and respectful relationships.

More than a method: A mindset for respectful care

The Pikler approach reminds al of us that learning happens in every moment not just through planned experiences but also through the daily rituals of care. These quiet, relational moments where educators pause, observe and connect build the emotional and cognitive foundations that children carry with them for life.

Embedding respectful care practices isn’t just about compliance or quality ratings. It’s about cultivating environments where children feel seen, heard and valued and where educators feel empowered to build deep, authentic relationships that support every child’s wellbeing.